Thomas Christopher
If your man suddenly just disappears, you start thinking: Hey, even the busiest man in the world, US president Barack Obama, finds time for his wife and kids, and this guy can't find time for me? Can my man be busier than the President? It doesn't matter what reasons he gives you, he is showing how little commitment he actually has. Men show their love by their actions. If he really loved you, he'd find time; if he doesn't find the time, you're well rid of him.
All these feelings aside, it is worth looking at some specific reasons why men just disappear. Recognizing some may help you change the situation. Others may help you accept it.
You try to control him
You've become very possessive, expecting so much from him, and demanding he do this and that. When a man feels like he can't do anything without your permission, he knows that he will never be happy as long as he is with you. When a woman tells a man that she won't have sex unless she is positive that the relationship is going somewhere, he is driven away. She is using sex to try to manipulate him.
He is only in it for sex
Some men only want sex. Although not all men are like this, many of them are. They stick because they want your body, but when you become too serious about the relationship, they're done and onto the next victim. This is one reason why men just disappear.
There is another woman
If a man suddenly just disappears from a steady relationship, it is probably for someone else. That someone may be more important than you, for example a best friend whom he really loves, an ex girlfriend whom he still loves, or simply a new one he's interested in.
He feels like he doesn't deserve you
He may feel he would want you for a wife, but he isn't able to support a family yet. He may grow to see you as a woman with whom to have a serious relationship, and he may not feel he can maintain a serious relationship. If he feels he doesn't deserve you, it may be a matter of bad timing -- men can quite suddenly come to see themselves as ready for marriage, and until then it seems impossible for them.
He's expecting more than a dinner date and a goodbye kiss
Why do men just disappear after all those romantic dinners, hugs, and kisses? One big reason is that the steps of intimacy have ended far short of intercourse. How can a man possibly spend for all those elegant dinners and expensive gifts if there's nothing in return? Although men are not exclusively interested in sex, it is a item. Sex is not only a source of pleasure, but typically a man's only path to human intimacy. If he cannot fulfill his intimacy needs in one relationship, he will be driven to fulfill them elsewhere.
If men keep disappearing, give it some thought. Maybe you are making it hard for the man to stay, or maybe you are starting up relationships with men who are not prepared for commitment.
For more on whether it is [http://tipswhatmenwant.com/Commitment.htm].
Thomas Christopher is a Colorado public speaker and trainer.
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